22 Times Your Period Saved Your Life
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It's that time of the month — the one that sneaks up every 28 days to ruin your day. You know what I'm talking about: the devil in literal red clothing; the crimson tide; the monster.
You guessed it, babe. Your period. Can I say something here? Something controversial, perhaps?
Yes, your period may come with cramps, bloating and a flush of hormones that have you oscillating between hulk like rage, and uncontrollable tears, but your period actually rocks. Your period is the GREATEST.
What now? Yes. Your heard me correctly. Your period is the best excuse for...everything. It is the ultimate trump card for...everything. No one can fault you for anything when Aunt Flow is in town. (Do we still call it Aunt Flow?)
Think about it for a second and I am sure you’ll find you agree. That menstruation has been a gift totally sans sarcasm more than you realize. Need reminding? I have you covered.
Here are 22 times your period saved your life.
Courtesy of Giphy1/231. When you really wanted out of gym class
Who even invented soccer, seriously. No, thank you!
Courtesy of Giphy2/232. When you didn't want to go out this weekend.
Sorry, friends. Cramps got me trippin'.
Courtesy of Giphy3/233. When you got in a fight with your dad.
"Papa, I am sloughing!" Conversation over. Parental baggage, terminated.
Courtesy of Giphy4/234. When you needed to get out of that pop quiz.
Surfing the crimson wave right on outta class. Bye, teach!
Courtesy of Giphy5/235. When you had second thoughts about a date.
It seemed like a good idea right up until it is time to go.
Courtesy of Giphy6/236. When you needed to opt out of babysitting your sibling.
You are in far too much pain to be bothered with children.
Courtesy of Giphy7/237. When you didn't want to go swimming and also kind of want to make a scene.
Ok, so sharks won’t eat you...but it's a good excuse nonetheless.
Courtesy of Giphy8/238. When your friend's party was more than a stone's throw from you.
Too far. Too many cramps. She understands your struggle.
Courtesy of Giphy9/239. When you just wanted to go home.
If you'd rather watch Netflix, but don't want to hurt your best friend's feelings, just blame your monthly gift.
Courtesy of Giphy10/2310. When you wanted to end a bad date.
Use the word "period," say something about "blood" or "leaking," and you're home-free.
Courtesy of Giphy11/2311. When you didn't want to kiss that person.
Does it make no sense or does it make all the sense?
Courtesy of Giphy12/2312. When you needed an excuse for being a bitch.
Because, hormones.
Courtesy of Giphy13/2313. When you wanted to cry, but didn't want to look like a mess.
Because, hormones.
Courtesy of Giphy14/2314. When you wanted to fight the hell out of patriarchy.
I have my period and I am WOMAN. HERE ME ROAR. Period activism. It’s a thing.
Courtesy of Giphy15/2315. When you just wanted to wear sweatpants everywhere.
SWEATPANTS ARE ALL THAT FIT ME RIGHT NOW.
Courtesy of Giphy16/2316. When you just wanted to stay in and masturbate because you're a person with needs.
Period = shield from all unwanted social interaction.
Courtesy of Giphy17/2317. When you wanted to eat cookies for dinner.
The best excuse for eating junk food is your period.
Courtesy of Giphy18/2318. When you forgot to shower.
You can't be blamed for looking like a grease-monkey. You have your period. God, people are so insensitive!? See. You win.
Courtesy of Giphy19/2319. When you forgot what 'being rational' was and felt like screaming at your partner.
They can't stay mad if you let them believe all the stereotypes about PMS are true, right? RIGHT?!
Courtesy of Giphy20/2320. When you wanted to skip the gym.
I mean, you're not going to go spin when you're cramping and are as bloated as a beached whale. That's not even healthy.
Courtesy of Giphy21/2321. When you wanted an annoying person (probably a boy, let's be real) to leave you alone.
Try screaming, "I have my period!" at someone and see if they keep being a pest. I DARE YOU.
Courtesy of Giphy22/2322. When you pretty much didn't want to do anything, see anyone, fulfill any obligation, or finish anything you were supposed to finish.
Period. Money card. Bye.
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