9 Free Self-Care Tips
Self care isn’t always bubble baths and pretty candles, sometimes it’s just getting out of bed, taking a shower, and reminding yourself how amazing you are. Self-love is meeting yourself exactly where you are at with compassion and love. It is knowing what serves you, and removing the things that don’t. Our worth isn’t determined by the clothes we wear, or by how many people have crushes on us. Outside validation might feel great for a second but it will quickly pass. Everyone’s mental health journey is their own, and I’d be lying if I said I did everything on this list regularly. Somedays I don’t have the time, somedays I don’t have the strength, and somedays I just don’t have the motivation — and that’s okay too. Allow space for your growth and remind yourself of your worth by investing in your health, your head, and your heart.
via GIPHY1/101. Affirmations
It might feel a little silly but there is something about looking straight into the mirror and saying, "I love you. You're worthy. You deserve greatness." You’ll be shocked at what a huge change these positive phrases can bring about in your life.
“The first step in creating affirmations is to clarify your intentions," says Heather Senior Monroe, MSW, LCSW, Director of Program Development at Newport Academy treatment centers for teens struggling with mental health issues, eating disorders, and substance abuse. "Intentions help us zero in on what we want to change and how we want to treat ourselves and others. To set your intentions, first ask yourself what you want to cultivate in your life. Then phrase [these intentions] not as concrete goals or things not to do, but as positive statements. For example, if you want to exercise more, you could set an affirmation such as, “I move my body to keep it strong and healthy.” If you want to cultivate greater appreciation for your life, your affirmation might be, “I am full of gratitude.”If you want to be kinder to yourself, your affirmation could be, “I love and appreciate who I am, right now.”
via GIPHY2/102. Be a Better Ally to Yourself and Others
There are so many things that school simply doesn’t teach you — like how to be a good ally, the importance of intersectionality, and what it means to have privilege. Self-improvement means learning how to be a better ally to others and, ultimately, yourself. The best way to learn about social justice is to listen to the marginalized amongst us, so thank god for sex-educator Ericka Hart, their partner Ebony Donnley, and their incredible podcast Hoodrat to Headwrap. This queer black couple breaks down white supremacy, queer identity, and a myriad of other topics. I recommend starting with “How We Love And Why We Even Bother” it will make you feel all the feels, and give you a glimpse into the realness these folks serve up.
via GIPHY3/103. Learn a New Hobby to Combat Stress
Have you always wanted to learn how to sew? Curious how to do needlepoint, or tie a sailor’s knot? Change your oil, become a photoshop pro, achieve the perfect dewy glow? YouTube baby! There are thousands of free tutorials where you can learn how to do literally anything. Jaime Kurtz, Ph.D, explains why having hobbies helps battle stress, because it teaches you not to put all your eggs in one basket. So spend 20 minutes a day investing in yourself, try out some hobbies, who knows you might even discover your passion.
via GIPHY4/104. Hit the Unfollow Button
Maybe it’s a celebrity that you compare yourself to, or a fitness model who makes you feel bad instead of making you feel motivated. Maybe it’s that really cool feminist news account you love, that sometimes makes you feel anxious about the world instead of fired up to save it. Even though social media is supposed to bring us together, studies show that it actually has the opposite effect, causing higher levels of anxiety, depression and a decline in social skills. Learn your limits, keep what works for you and get rid of what doesn’t. Remember you don’t have to compare yourself to every supermodel, or expose yourself to every awful Trump tweet.
via GIPHY5/105. Volunteer
It might sound cheesy but volunteering really does make you feel great and there are so many more ways to help out than just at your local soup kitchen. Get involved in a political campaign as a youth supporter, organize an intersectional club at your school, run a tampon drive and donate the menstrual supplies you collect to local homeless shelters. Sign up to tutor underprivileged kids, or cuddle pups at your local animal shelter. Is social media is your thing? Create an activist account to raise money and inspire others to make change. Give yourself the gift of giving back.
6/106. Meditate the Stress Away
The Stop, Breathe & Think app offers several dozen short meditations and also explains what mindfulness is, why it’s beneficial and the neuroscience behind it.
And if mediation still seems like too large a leap just try some simple grounding techniques. “One way to incorporate mindfulness into your life is to make it part of your everyday routine, in small doses. For example, before you brush your teeth in the morning and at night, take three slow, deep breaths. This is also very helpful if you’re feeling stressed; many teenagers find this type of conscious breathing especially helpful before a big test or game, as a way to take a time-out during a conflict with someone, or to relax before going to sleep.” says Heather Senior Monroe, MSW, LCSW, Director of Program Development at Newport Academy treatment centers for teens struggling with mental health issues, eating disorders, and substance abuse.
via GIPHY7/107. Make Your Favorite Activities Political
We are living in a revolutionary time. Yes, it’s politically terrifying but the people are rising up. Youth involvement is a huge part of that and the best way to make change is to utilize whatever skills you already have. Using your favorite activities as a way to stand up for what you believe in is empowering. “If you like to roller skate then have a roller skating party and give the money to charity," says Van Jones, journalist and author of Beyond The Messy Truth. ”If you like to DJ then party with a purpose. Use the function that you’re having to pull people together, throw up some art that will educate people, invite spoken word poets to educate people, pass out literature to educate people. You can still have a good time. It’s not just like ‘I have to march, go to prison, die for the cause.’ No. Just do what you do and then make that relevant to what you care about, and for groups you want to support."
via GIPHY8/108. Masturbate
A huge part of learning to love yourself is learning to love your body, understanding how it works, and how it receives pleasure. “Stress is one of the most physically detrimental things and masturbation is a powerful form of both self-soothing and stress relief," says Dr. Chris Donaghue, author of Sex Outside the Lines and cohost of the Loveline Podcast with Amber Rose. "It’s a right brain activity, much like yoga or meditation, and is equally as legitimate and powerful a tool for creating a neurological and biological state of relaxation, relief, and restoration. It’s especially important for teens to get in touch with their bodies so they can gain confidence and learn to communicate authentically about sexuality.”
9/109. Cry
Cry, just let it all out. This applies to girls and gender non-conforming folks, but especially to cis-boys who’ve been told to repress their tears and that crying isn’t masculine. This couldn’t be more inaccurate; sometimes you just need to release all of your pent up emotions. When I’m feeling particularly bottled up I’ll queue up a sad movie or an heart-wrenching episode of This Is Us. It helps to cry about something that isn’t your own life, it allows for the catharsis without all the interpersonal pain. So grab some tissues and cleanse your soul with a big cry sesh. You've earned it.
via GIPHY10/10BONUS: Gift
Let this Heart Myself Patch be a physical reminder that there is no relationship more important than the one you have with yourself. Rock it on your favorite jacket or pop it on a back-pack to proudly proclaim that you love your damn self, and that’s okay!
