Identity

This Ballerina Survived Sexual Assault, and the Harrowing Process of Accusing Her Instructor

She is beyond brave.
By Lauren Duca
Image may contain Ballet Dance Human Person and Ballerina
Russian dancer Anna Nikulina (as 'Odette-Odile') and others during Act I in the Bolshoi Ballet production of 'Swan Lake' (by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikvosky and choreographed by Yuri Grigorovich) during the Lincoln Center Festival at the Lincoln Center's David H Koch Theater, New York, New York, July 15, 2014. (Photo by Linda Vartoogian/Getty Images)Getty Images

A new piece from Buzzfeed highlights the incredible bravery of ballerina Lissa Curtis, who accused her instructor of sexual assault, and has since become a spokesperson for survivors.

It's a rather in-depth story, though the Sparknotes go something like this: Lissa was assaulted multiple times over a nine-day trip to a ballet competition in Romania. She reported the incident(s) when she returned, and found she needed the help of the FBI, who only had jurisdiction over the flight (and not anything that had happened abroad). After seeing her colleagues continue to work with her attacker, Lissa decided to take her story public. She filed for a protective order, and now recounts her experiences openly, and has even crafted a ballet piece to express her struggles, all while suffering from PTSD.

From Buzzfeed:

Saying publicly that you were sexually assaulted can open you up to scrutiny and to the pain of having to repeatedly defend yourself from all corners against claims that you are lying or seeking attention. You also risk becoming narrowly defined not only as “the woman who was raped” but also “the resilient survivor.” You are both simultaneously what happened to you and recovered from it, too. There is no room to exist somewhere in between. To be not just a survivor, but someone who is actively surviving.

Curtis advocates on behalf of survivors through her ballet, even as that very art triggers her severe PTSD and pushes her to her mental and emotional limits. “I feel as though I live with a ticking time bomb inside my chest,” Curtis says. “Some days the bomb goes off — the flashbacks, memories, and terrifying PTSD flooding happens, which cripple me for the hours after and often the next day. Other days I just hear the tick, but it’s always there, a rattling anxiety in my chest.”

This piece highlights the intense struggle of coming forward, as if being sexually assaulted weren't traumatizing enough. All victims should do what is best for them, but Lissa's incredible bravery will hopefully help more women like her to feel strong enough to fight back.

Head over to Buzzfeed to read the full story, then read our piece on campus sexual assault.

Related: What You Need to Know About Getting Help If You’ve Been Sexually Assaulted

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