Joaquin Oliver, 17, had been dead for only a few hours when corners of the internet decided the mass shooting in which he was killed hadn’t happened at all or, if it had happened, was a planned attack meant to facilitate gun control legislation. Users were split on the details of the conspiracy. Some argued about whether any victims had actually died, which of the surviving students were hired crisis actors, and what role the FBI played in the attack, but the through line was the same: Whatever had happened at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, it wasn’t simply a school shooting in a country where gun deaths have become an everyday occurrence. It was, they insisted, part of a complex conspiracy in which each player must be examined for the truth to be found.
Anonymous Reddit and 4chan users weren’t the only people vowing to get to the bottom of what really happened in Parkland, Florida. On the day of the shooting, noted conspiracy theorist Alex Jones used his Infowars show to question whether the shooting was a “false flag attack.” Less than a week after the tragedy that claimed 17 lives, Donald Trump Jr., son of then president Trump, “liked” two tweets that seemed to promote the false narrative of FBI involvement because surviving student David Hogg’s father was an FBI agent. In the ensuing months, the theories would expand and warp, spread by people like Marjorie Taylor Greene, who would go on to become the first open supporter of Q Anon to win a seat in Congress.
Manuel Oliver, father of Parkland victim Joaquin, doesn’t feel the need to prove his son died on February 14, 2018. He doesn’t care if you think the shooting was a “false flag” planned with ulterior motives or if you believe survivors were crisis actors. “I’m a busy activist who represents a 17-year-old kid that lost his life because he was shot four times with an AR-15,” Oliver told Teen Vogue. “My son was destroyed, literally destroyed. His brain exploded because of the power that an AR-15 has. I don’t have to prove that to anyone. I’m already dealing with it and I’m very busy trying to protect other fathers [from] going through the same pain.”
Oliver doesn’t let himself get consumed by the conspiracy theories surrounding Parkland and other mass shootings because he has more important work to do and he sees the theories as a “cheap, dirty, political strategy.” The way he and his wife, Patricia, lost Joaquin, Oliver said, was the worst possible scenario. Next to the depth of mourning him, conspiracy theories spread on internet forums or in the halls of Congress seem paltry and inconsequential. The family’s pain is so vast it is untouched by lies. And Oliver isn’t fighting against conspiracy theorists, he’s fighting to stop gun violence through constant activism like the publication of Patricia’s book, Joaquin’s First School Shooting. He’s gotten arrested at House hearings on gun laws and interrupted President Biden during a speech at the White House. He has spoken out against governor Ron DeSantis (R–FL) — who recently signed a bill allowing concealed carry without a permit — and made connections with other parents who have lost children in mass shootings. This is how Oliver parents now.
“I refuse to stop being a dad,” he said. “I am Joaquin’s dad. I have to represent Joaquin and I have to protect my son, regardless of where he is right now. That’s my son. I’m still here. Joaquin’s dad is still here. I will bring my son’s name to every platform, every audience. I know what my kid wanted, what he was dreaming about. And I’m going to make it happen because I am what he is now.”
The proliferation of conspiracy theories on social media has complicated the grieving process for those who lost loved ones in public mass tragedies, adding a sick new dimension to their pain. Lenny Pozner, whose six-year-old son, Noah, was killed at Sandy Hook Elementary School, was forced to live in hiding after receiving death threats when Jones and other conspiracists spread rumors about whether he and his child existed. Pozner released the medical examiner’s report of his son’s death, which did nothing to deter conspiracy theorists. However, in 2022, Jones filed for bankruptcy after being ordered by the court to pay more than $1.4 billion in damages to Sandy Hook families for calling the shooting an “inside job” and a “government operation.”
The family of Seth Rich, a Democratic National Committee staffer who was killed in a botched robbery, had to contend with theories that he’d actually been murdered for leaking DNC emails to WikiLeaks. (The family reached a settlement in a lawsuit against Fox News, in which they accused the network of promoting a “sham” story about their son that caused them “mental anguish and emotional distress, emotional pain and suffering, and physical and mental injuries.”) And countless Americans who lost family and friends to COVID witnessed the spread of hoaxes about the alleged dangers of the vaccines and whether the virus was even real.
What makes a person engage in conspiracy theories when the loved ones of victims are begging to be heard? Pasha Dashtgard, PhD, and the director of research at American University’s Polarization & Extremism Research & Innovation Lab (PERIL) told Teen Vogue conspiratorial thinking can arise from the inability to conceptualize a terrible tragedy. “In some situations, the truth and reality of the situation are so painful and so abhorrent it forces you to reconsider the basic tenets of your reality and framework, such that you go searching for alternative explanations,” Dr. Dashtgard said. In the case of mass shootings, a person may be unable to conceptually accept that children could be slaughtered in school and because of that disbelief they choose another explanation, that the shooting was a “false flag” or part of a deliberate plan to promote gun control. In this way, conspiracy theories can be a way to feel in control in an out-of-control world. “The idea with 9/11, for example, that a building could just randomly be destroyed, is so threatening that it’s actually much more comforting, in a sense, to believe that the government would have faked that,” Dr. Dashtgard added. “We want to reach for explanations of our reality that do the least to disrupt it.”
When soldier Vanessa Guillen, 20, disappeared from the Army base formerly known as Fort Hood, now renamed Fort Cavazos, the case captivated the country. Fringe theories spread about the disappearance of the soldier, from claims that a cult was involved to suspicions that a serial killer was to blame. In the months before Guillen’s remains were found, her sister Mayra told Teen Vogue that any lead, as unlikely as it may have seemed, was something to follow up on. “Everything was important to us,” Mayra said. “We would take a look in every direction.” But sometime before her sister’s body was found, Mayra became the focus of theorists who claimed she had been involved in the disappearance. Desperate and anxious to find Vanessa, Mayra couldn’t believe a finger could be pointed in her direction. “I was like, what do I do? Do I laugh? Do I cry? What do I do?” she said. Mayra found it strange to watch online creators use her sister’s disappearance as fodder for views and followers. “That’s when it got upsetting… to use someone else’s tragedy in order to get… fame or attention.”
Vanessa’s remains were found on June 30, 2020, and the truth behind her murder was less fantastical than the theories that posited a cult or her own sister’s involvement. Prosecutors alleged that fellow soldier Aaron Robinson, 20, had killed Vanessa before burying her remains in a shallow grave. Robinson killed himself just days before charges were filed against him. A report later confirmed what Vanessa’s family had claimed, that she had been sexually harassed before she was killed (though not by Robinson, who had been accused of unrelated sexual harassment, according to The Times). In the case of Vanessa Guillen, theorists looked for a farfetched answer to the question of a missing soldier despite the fact that she disappeared from an Army base infamous for a rash of murders, suicides, fatal accidents, and two mass shootings and that statistics show female murder victims are likely to know their assailants.
Bigger-picture conspiracy theories, like the idea that COVID was planned or is less deadly than official government records claim, have a personal dimension, too. Kaitlyn Urenda, 31, lost her mother, Genevieve Martinez, to the virus in July 2020. When she comes across people spouting conspiracy theories about the illness that killed her mother, she says her first thought is, “Are you kidding?” It’s not that Urenda doesn’t understand the lure of conspiracy theories. She sees the fun in discussing the possible existence of aliens or Big Foot, but she sees death as a stark dividing line: “To theorize over people’s true life and loss, that’s not a conspiracy theory,” she told Teen Vogue. “That’s misinformation. It’s unwise, it’s deceitful, it’s divisive, and it’s painful.”
Though it can be tempting to completely dismiss anyone spreading misinformation, Urenda strives to stay open-minded. If faced with a conspiracy theorist denying or minimizing her mother’s death, she says she would ask them follow-up questions like where they get their news, who their favorite influencer is, and what podcasts they listen to. “Asking those questions helps me keep them human,” she said. “That’s the best way I can honor my mom. She was the most compassionate person and merciful to everyone. You have to emulate what you want to see — compassion and hope.”
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